If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
