marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
