ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize