Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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