Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
