I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
