I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
