Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
