escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
