And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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