You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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