i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
home. puking in laundry basket.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
