Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
