Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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