I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
