Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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