oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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