We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize