i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I just threw up on my dentist
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
