Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
