Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize