We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
