im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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