I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
