Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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