Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize