i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
