Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
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