No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Every concussion has its silver lining
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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