Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
