Please, let me fuck your mom
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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