I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Randomize
