During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
