Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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