I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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