Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize
