her vagine was all disorganized.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
