You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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