I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
