Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Are we still banned from the library?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
