TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
