Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
