Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Randomize
