i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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