No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
