'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
