I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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