I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
