My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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