why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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